The Law of Reversed Potential and How to Break Through Resistance

The Law of Reversed Potential (Coye’s Law) Why life feels hardest right before your breakthrough – and how to move through it

Introduction – When Everything Falls Apart Right Before It Comes Together

You’ve probably lived this scene:

You’re finally consistent with the gym. Or you’re about to launch the project you’ve been dreaming about for years. Or your relationships feel deeper and more honest than ever.

Then, out of nowhere, something shifts.

You start procrastinating. You pick stupid fights. You get “too busy” to do the very habits that were working. Old addictions or distractions suddenly look irresistible.

You look at the chaos and think, “What is wrong with me? I was doing so well. Maybe I’m just not meant for this.”“What is wrong with me? I was doing so well. Maybe I’m just not meant for this.”

This is where The Law of Reversed Potential (Coye’s Law) enters.

Coye’s Law (The Law of Reversed Potential): The closer you get to expressing your true potential, the more your inner resistance and external chaos rise in the oppositeopposite direction — creating the illusion that you’re moving backward when you’re actually on the edge of a breakthrough.

In simple terms: When your potential rises, your resistance often rises too — and it usually shows up right before a big shift.

This isn’t a curse. It’s not the universe punishing you. It’s a pattern: psychological, emotional, and often very predictable.

This article will help you:

• Understand what Coye’s Law really is (and isn’t).
• Recognise it in your own life.
• Navigate the “reversed” phase without giving up.
• Turn moments of sabotage into fuel for growth.

1. What Is The Law of Reversed Potential?

Think of your life as a rubber band.

When you stretch it toward a new possibility — a healthier body, a successful business, a more honest relationship — you’re increasing its potential energy.

At first, the stretch feels exciting:

• New routines
• Fresh motivation
• Clear vision

But the further you stretch, the more tension there is in the band. At a certain point, that tension is uncomfortable. A part of you just wants to let go and snap back to where you started.

Coye’s Law describes this moment:

The more you stretch toward your potential, the more force pulls you back toward your old identity, habits, and comfort zone.

This “reversed” effect shows up as:

• Sudden procrastination or laziness.
• Emotional meltdowns over small things.
• Strange drama and conflicts in your relationships.
• Random distractions, accidents, or opportunities to quit.

It looks like life (or you) are going backward.

But in reality, this is the activation energy of change — the last internal battle between your old self and your emerging self.

A Short Story: Nadia’s Almost-Breakthrough

Nadia had always dreamed of starting her own design studio.

For months, she woke up early, worked on her portfolio, took online courses, and saved money. She finally handed in her resignation letter at her corporate job. Her last day was three weeks away.

Then things got weird.

She stopped working on her website. She binged series until 2 a.m. She picked fights with her partner about money. She even caught herself browsing new job postings, “just in case.”

One night, in tears, she said, “Maybe this is a sign I’m not ready. Everything is falling apart.”“Maybe this is a sign I’m not ready. Everything is falling apart.”

From the outside, it looked like self-destruction.

From the inside, it was Coye’s Law at work.

Her potential had never been higher. She was closer than ever to the life she envisioned — and her nervous system was panicking. The “reversed” behaviour was not proof that she was failing. It was proof that she was right on the threshold.

Once she understood that, she stopped seeing the chaos as a verdict and started treating it as a signal:

“My resistance is loud right now, which means my next level is close.”

2. How Coye’s Law Relates to Comfort Zones, Fear of Success, and Self-Sabotage

Coye’s Law doesn’t exist in a vacuum. It weaves together several well-known psychological patterns:

a) Comfort Zone and Homeostasis

Your mind and body like stability. Psychologists call this homeostasis — the tendency to maintain the current state, even if that state isn’t great.

• If you’re used to drama, peace feels suspicious.
• If you’re used to poverty, abundance can feel uncomfortable.
• If you’re used to being ignored, attention can feel threatening.

When you stretch beyond your comfort zone, your system rings the alarm. Coye’s Law says: the alarm gets loudest right before a real shift becomes permanent.

b) Fear of Success (Not Just Fear of Failure)

We often talk about fear of failure, but fear of success is just as powerful.

Success might mean:

• More responsibility
• Higher expectations
• Being seen and judged
• Losing excuses you’ve held for years (“I can’t because…”)

As your potential rises, fear of success whispers:

• “If I actually lose this weight, people will expect me to keep it off.”
• “If my business works, I’ll have to show up consistently.”
• “If I become emotionally healthy, I might outgrow certain people.”

Coye’s Law says: the closer you are to success, the more your fear tries to protect you by dragging you backward.

c) Resistance and Self-Sabotage

Resistance is any force that pushes against what you say you want.

Self-sabotage is how that resistance expresses itself in your behaviour:

• You procrastinate.
• You overcommit to things that don’t matter.
• You reach for food, scrolling, gossip, or chaos instead of doing the important work.

Coye’s Law doesn’t glorify sabotage; it explains its timing:

You don’t sabotage yourself because you’re weak. You often sabotage yourself because you’re scared of who you’re becoming.

The sabotage is reverse potential: energy that could move you forward being flipped into behaviours that pull you back.

3. The Psychology Behind Reversed Potential

Let’s go deeper into what’s actually happening inside you when Coye’s Law kicks in.

3.1. Identity Threat

At the core of your mind is a simple question: “Who am I?”

Maybe your quiet inner identity is:

• “I’m someone who always struggles with money.”
• “I’m the one who never finishes anything.”
• “I’m the peacemaker who never upsets anyone.”

When your actions begin to contradict that identity (“I’m saving money”, “I’m finishing this book”, “I’m saying no”), your brain registers a threat.

Not a physical threat, but an identity threat.

The subconscious mind prefers a familiar misery over an unknown freedom.

Result: as your behaviour upgrades, your identity fights to pull you back into alignment with the old story — producing procrastination, guilt, or anxiety.

3.2. Emotional Flooding

As you approach a new level (career, fitness, love, self-respect), a lot of old emotions surface:

• Fear: “What if I can’t handle this?”
• Shame: “Who do I think I am to want this?”
• Guilt: “Will I leave others behind?”
• Grief: “I’m losing the old version of me… and maybe some relationships too.”

These emotions flood your system. If you’re not prepared, you’ll interpret them as proof:

• “See? I feel awful. This must be wrong.”

Coye’s Law reframes it:

The emotional storm often means you are crossing from one identity to another – a psychological rite of passage.

3.3. Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance is the discomfort you feel when your beliefs and your actions don’t match.

• You believe you’re “bad with money,” but you’re suddenly making more.
• You believe you’re “unlovable,” but someone is actually loving you well.
• You believe you “never stick with habits,” but your tracker says 30 days in a row.

This mismatch creates mental tension.

To reduce the tension, your brain has two options:

1. Upgrade the belief:
   “Maybe I’m more capable than I thought.”
2. Downgrade the behaviour:
   Skip the gym, overspend, push the partner away, stop the project.

Without awareness, most people unconsciously choose option 2. That’s reversed potential in action.

4. How to Work With Coye’s Law in Daily Life

Understanding the law is useless if you can’t apply it.

Here’s a practical framework:

Notice → Name → Normalize → Navigate

4.1. NOTICE – Catch the Pattern in Real Time

Start by noticing when things feel reversed.

Signs Coye’s Law is active:

• You were consistent, now you “randomly” stop.
• You’re close to a milestone (launch, exam, promotion, difficult conversation), and your life suddenly fills with distractions.
• You feel a surge of old habits or cravings right when you’ve been making progress.

Journaling prompt:

“Where in my life was I making progress… and suddenly felt pulled backward?”

Write freely for 10–15 minutes. Don’t edit. Just observe.

4.2. NAME – Call It What It Is

Once you notice the pattern, name it:

• “This isn’t proof I’m failing. This is reversed potential.”
• “My resistance is loud today because my potential is high.”

This small act of naming breaks the spell of shame.

It moves you from:

• “I’m broken.”
  to
• “My nervous system is reacting to growth.”

Reflection questions:

• What breakthrough might my system be reacting to right now?
• If this chaos is a sign of progress, what progress might it be?

4.3. NORMALIZE – Make It Human, Not Personal Failure

Remind yourself:

• Everyone experiences this.
• Successful people aren’t people without resistance; they are people who expect resistance and keep moving responsibly.

You can even create a personal mantra:

• “It’s darkest before dawn, and I’m learning to walk through the dark.”
• “Resistance shows me where my next upgrade is.”

4.4. NAVIGATE – Behavioural Experiments

Now the most important part: act differently in the middle of the chaos.

Try this simple experiment structure:

IF I notice [old pattern], THEN I will [small empowered action].

Examples:

• IF I feel the urge to scroll instead of working,
  THEN I will set a 10-minute timer and do just one tiny step.
• IF I start picking a fight before a big opportunity,
  THEN I will pause, take three deep breaths, and say,
  “I’m feeling nervous about this next step. Can we talk about that instead?”
• IF I want to cancel a commitment that aligns with my future self,
  THEN I will wait 24 hours and journal before deciding.

These micro-actions teach your nervous system:

“We can feel this much fear and still move forward safely.”

Over time, the reversed potential phase becomes less dramatic. The resistance may still appear, but it no longer controls you.

5. Exercises to Integrate Coye’s Law

Here are practical exercises you can use this week.

Exercise 1: The Two Selves Dialogue

Goal: Reveal the conflict between your old identity and your emerging identity.

1. Open your journal and divide the page into two columns:
   • Left: “Old Self”
   • Right: “Emerging Self”
2. Ask the Old Self: Let it answer honestly:

“What are you afraid will happen if I fully step into my potential?”

• “People will judge you.”
• “We’ll be alone.”
• “We might fail and look stupid.”
• “We’ll lose control.”

1. Ask the Emerging Self: Let it answer:

“What do you know to be true about our potential?”

• “We are more resilient than we think.”
• “We’re allowed to outgrow old patterns.”
• “We can learn from mistakes.”

1. Read both sides out loud.
   This conversation turns the vague chaos into clear, negotiable fears.

Exercise 2: The Reversed Potential Map

Goal: See where resistance shows up as a sign of growth.

1. Draw three circles or sections:
   • Health & Energy
   • Work & Money
   • Love & Relationships
2. For each area, answer:
   • Where have I seen progress in the last 3–6 months?
   • When did I feel a sudden “pull backward”? (Be specific: dates, events.)
   • What exact behaviours showed up? (Scrolling, anger, overeating, skipping, etc.)
3. Next to each reversed moment, write:

“This was a sign my potential in this area was increasing.”

This alone can be life-changing. You’ll see that your “worst” moments often came right after powerful steps forward.

Exercise 3: The 1% Forward Rule

When reversed potential hits, your instinct is often:

• Go all in (again) with unrealistic intensity, or
• Collapse completely and do nothing.

Instead, commit to 1% forward.

Every day, ask:

“What is one small action that keeps me connected to my future self today?”

Examples:

• Sending one email.
• Doing 10 minutes of deep work.
• Going for a 15-minute walk.
• Saying one honest sentence in a hard conversation.

Small, consistent actions are how you walk through the storm without burning out.

6. Common Mistakes and Myths About Coye’s Law

When people first hear about the Law of Reversed Potential, they sometimes misuse it. Let’s clear that up.

Myth 1: “If things are chaotic, it always means a breakthrough is coming.”

Not necessarily.

Sometimes chaos is just the result of poor boundaries, overcommitment, or ignoring your basic needs.

How to tell the difference:

• If you’ve been moving with intention (building habits, making aligned choices), and chaos spikes right as you approach a meaningful step — it’s likely reversed potential.
• If chaos has been there for years, with no real movement — that’s not reversed potential; that’s simply your current baseline.

Myth 2: “I can keep walking into unhealthy situations and call it ‘reversed potential.’”

Coye’s Law doesn’t excuse:

• Abusive relationships
• Exploitative workplaces
• Chronic self-neglect

If a situation is harming you, leaving may be your next level of potential. The resistance you feel might actually be the fear of walking away, not the fear of staying.

Myth 3: “If I’m not suffering, I’m not growing.”

Growth doesn’t require constant pain.

The Law of Reversed Potential describes a phase, not a 24/7 lifestyle.

You’re allowed to have:

• Seasons of ease
• Quiet progress
• Gentle, sustainable change

If you’re addicted to struggle, you might unconsciously create chaos just to feel like you’re “doing the work.” That’s not growth; that’s self-torture in spiritual clothing.

Myth 4: “Resistance means I’m not meant for this.”

One of the cruelest lies.

In reality:

The presence of resistance often confirms that what you are attempting mattersmatters to you.

You rarely feel deep resistance about things that are irrelevant. You feel it around the projects, relationships, and habits that touch your identity and your future.

7. A 7-Day Plan to Work With Reversed Potential

Here’s a simple, structured action plan.

Day 1 – Awareness

• Journal: “Where in my life have I recently felt pulled backward right after progress?”
• Circle one area you want to focus on this week.

Day 2 – Mapping

• Do Exercise 2: The Reversed Potential Map for that area.
• Identify your main sabotage behaviours (e.g., scrolling, oversleeping, withdrawing).

Day 3 – Dialogue

• Do Exercise 1: The Two Selves Dialogue focused on this area.
• Underline any sentences from the Old Self that feel especially true or painful. These are your core fears.

Day 4 – Design Your IF–THEN Plan

Create 2–3 personal IF–THEN statements for your main sabotage patterns.

Example:

• IF I want to skip my writing session,
  THEN I will write just one messy paragraph before deciding.

Write them somewhere visible (phone notes, sticky notes).

Day 5 – Practice One 1% Action

• Ask: “What is my 1% forward today?”
• Do it, even if you feel nothing, even if your mood is low.

Notice: you do not need to “feel ready” to honour your future self.

Day 6 – Reflection

• Journal on these questions:
  • When did I feel resistance this week?
  • How did I respond differently because I understand Coye’s Law?
  • What surprised me about myself?

Day 7 – Integration and Commitment

• Write a short letter to yourself, starting with:

“I expect resistance on the way to my potential, and here’s how I will treat myself when it shows up…”

• End with a concrete 30-day commitment:
  • One habit you’ll keep.
  • One pattern you’re no longer willing to glorify.

Conclusion – Your Struggle Is Not a Sign You’re Broken

If you’re reading this, there’s a good chance you’re in a reversed potential phase right now.

You might be:

• On the edge of real financial responsibility.
• On the edge of emotional maturity.
• On the edge of sharing your work with the world.
• On the edge of finally respecting your body and mind.

And suddenly:

• You’re tired.
• You’re moody.
• You’re “too busy.”
• You’re tempted to quit.

Coye’s Law doesn’t say this phase is pleasant. It says this phase is meaningful.

The chaos before your next chapter is not proof you’re unworthy; it’s proof that your current identity is being stretched to include more of who you really are.

The invitation is not to fight yourself, nor to worship your pain, but to:

• Notice the pattern.
• Name it for what it is.
• Normalize it as part of growth.
• Navigate it with small, courageous actions.

Key Takeaways

• Coye’s Law (Law of Reversed Potential):
  The closer you get to your true potential, the more resistance and chaos tend to increase, creating the illusion of moving backward.
• Reversed potential shows up as procrastination, self-sabotage, and emotional storms — especially right before big shifts.
• This resistance is driven by identity threat, emotional flooding, and cognitive dissonance, not by your lack of worth or ability.
• You can work with the law using the Notice → Name → Normalize → Navigate framework, along with simple tools like IF–THEN plans and 1% actions.
• Your struggles are not a final verdict. They are often a sign that you are standing at the threshold of a new version of yourself.

For the next seven days, treat every surge of resistance as a quiet signal:

“Something important is trying to be born through me.”

Stay. Breathe. Take one small step forward. Your potential is not disappearing — it’s asking you to grow big enough to hold it.